Dismal

Twas a dismal day today for sure. It was dark, cold, and rainy. I plowed through the streets of nyc with the rain drops pelting off my umbrella like the sound of change hitting the top of a bed. There were various puddles with various depths to those puddles. People avoided them in the manner of children playing hopscotch. I too followed in step! I meandered through the puddles and into work at a moments notice. There was a stillness to the air much like that of winter but with a spring-time moisture lurking in the air. Then it rained again! A fog covered haze was the fabric of the sky. A creative sense of urgency saturated the strides of the people with whom I passed by. Sometimes even the busiest of people are truly going no where. The desire to act important is ubiquitous. You see it everyday. You can hear it in the tone of a conversation. It occurs when an individual offers a narcissistic side of their psyche. As if you ever asked everything about a persons professional life. The silence and emptiness that fills the air is uncomfortable and disrupted by those that hurt their hands patting themselves on the back so much! To me when that silence is breached with self absorbed ways, I am selfishly quick to change the topic to something that no one else is interested in. That way, those types walk away. The reason for the usual hasty departure is lack of interest, unfamiliar territory, and, no self fulfilling prophecy.

I generally enjoy the inception of new people into my life, but, it's tough when it's exclusively an outward display of one's inner monologue. Maybe people truly don't mean to tell you how much they make and all of their accomplishments? Perhaps they forgot to bring a good book along with them? It's possible that people talk about themselves and all of their accomplishments because they can't handle the tranquility of the air or, they find themselves to be void of interesting subject matter? These are questions that by design, cannot be answered. They are merely murky remains of a dismal day.

James Hartnett